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Posted on Mon. May. 19, 2014 - 12:01 am EDT

LIFE . . . WITHOUT BUMPER PADS

Oversleeping puts family’s school prep to test

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I had never felt so relaxed.

It was Saturday; I had no appointments or responsibilities. It was beautiful outside. I sipped my coffee contentedly and watched ducks cross my backyard.

There was a strange sound, though. Distant, but monotonous. I turned my head to determine where it was coming from. Some kind of intermittent vibrating sound …

“Mom! It's 7:30!”

The shout reached all the way into my subconscious and pulled me out of my backyard — and into the real world.

It was not Saturday.

I was not free of responsibility.

My alarm had been on vibrate.

And I was really, really late.

I bolted upright in bed. I was bleary eyed, panicked and unsure what to do first. I could hear the frenetic bustling of my oldest child as he navigated the same exhausted confusion I was in. Then, as if someone had snapped me back like a rubber band, I sprang into action.

I surveyed my environment. Three kids, two still sleeping. I darted from one room to the next, back and forth, until I saw motion from each child. Spinning in circles, I considered my next move.

Breakfast.

In less than two minutes, three bowls of cereal and three glasses of juice appeared on the table.

“Breakfast!” I bellowed as I darted to the bathroom.

A hair wash was way too much to ask on this morning. Deciding bobby pins and hairspray would be my look for the day, I mentally chose what ensemble needed the least amount of ironing as I lathered up.

Shower over. Grabbing a robe, I peeked my head around the corner to look warily at the clock.

7:43 a.m.

“I can do this!” I affirmed to myself as my son walked by. He shook his head at my antics and kept on moving.

Running back to the kitchen, I surveyed my two youngest. Two small masses of hair and pajamas sat sleepily slurping cereal. No sign of school attire was anywhere.

“OK,” I muttered more to myself than anyone. “Finish breakfast, get your clothes on, brush your teeth and come see me for hair. Five minutes!”

Sprinting back to my bedroom, I unearthed clothing that would belie my morning. Pulling it on as I brushed my teeth, I peered out the doorway.

Clothing adornment was in process.

I uttered my mantra.

“I can do this, I can do this, I can do this.”

My youngest son appeared, sporting a backwards shirt and an inadvertent Mohawk. Thirty seconds later, gelled and reversed, he switched places with his sister.

“Ow! Ow! Ow!” she cried as I battled time versus tangles.

I bit my lip.

“Pony tail day!” I announced to a squeal of happiness.

And in my bathroom that morning, the '80s returned: side ponytails became in vogue again.

We all migrated to the kitchen and fumbled around each other as we packed lunches, loaded backpacks and found shoes.

8:08 a.m.

“Everyone in the car!” I exclaimed, and we exited unceremoniously, breathlessly piling into the car.

Pulling into the school parking lot at exactly 8:21, my children and I all threw ourselves out of the doors and ran through the parking lot.

We had made it.

After each child was safely delivered to the appropriate classroom, I walked slowly back to my car, taking deep breaths. I climbed in, leaned my head back and enjoyed the silence.

We did it.

And now, it was time for coffee. A lot of coffee.


Jill Adams is a professional writer based in Fort Wayne. This column is the personal opinion of the writer and does not necessarily reflect the views or opinion of The News-Sentinel. Jill Adams blogs at http://lifewithoutbumperpads.blogspot.com.


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