When you’re a child, your summer is filled with activities that are a pure expression of your joy to be alive.

When you’re an adult, your summer is filled with thinking about doing activities that are a pure expression of your joy to be alive, and then not doing them.

Oh, sure. Crossing things like “aerate lawn” off your to-do list can make you feel quite euphoric. But can crossing things off a to-do list really be described as a joyful activity? It can if you cross them off with a quill pen while wearing red velvet doublets, a jerkin, hose and a codpiece.

Unfortunately, most of us only own two or three of those things.

Fear not. I am here to help you get the most out of your summer in northeast Indiana with tips that will help you set a livelier tone in the coming months.

Just go ahead and buy the lederhosen: There isn’t a man who doesn’t own lederhosen who hasn’t gazed longingly at a man who does own lederhosen. Whether he is gazing longingly at the man or longingly at his lederhosen, he IS gazing longingly. So make this the year that you wear authentic lederhosen to Fort Wayne Germanfest as Odin intended.

Dance at the Fort Wayne Greek Festival: The Greek physician Hippocrates is alleged to have said: “Let food be thy medicine, and medicine be thy food.” What he meant is that we should  eat five baklava sundaes in a single sitting. Trust me on this, even though my nickname is Hypocritees. But this paragraph isn’t about food but dancing. There is a lot of great dancing to watch at the Fort Wayne Greek Festival, but there is also a lot of great Greek dancing to do. Spectators are periodically asked to come up and try their hand (and feet) at something called (I think) the Kalamatianós. It’s not hard to master and it’s the most fun you will have all year on any area dance floor. Just wait until after you dance to eat those sundaes.

Take walks during the workday: If your job requires you to sit at a desk for long periods at a time, you need to figure out a way to slip out of your employer-mandated leg cuffs and go for a stroll every so often. Just be sure to get back before your boss yells, “Release the hounds!”

Invent a new fair food: Even if you are not a fair food impresario, there is nothing stopping you from inventing a new fair food. What you need to do is go to Food Alley at the Three Rivers Festival, buy two things and mash them together. This year I will be enjoying my latest creation: The pork tenderloin banana split.

Create your own signature summer cocktail: Who hasn’t wanted to stroll into a pub and say, “I’ll have the Perry Toebinfoebin.” Of course, that’s only special if your name is Perry Toebinfoebin. Being able to order a drink named after you is pretty much the only upside to being named Perry Toebinfoebin. Don’t invent the Perry Toebinfoebin. Invent a cocktail and name it after you. Bonus points for chutzpah if you use Jeppson’s Malört as a base.

Buy a piece of original art: At dozens of Hoosier festivals this summer, people will be selling original art. Buy some and take it home. Your wife and mother are right: It’s time to take down those “Mr. Natural” and “Keep on Truckin'” black-light posters.

Dine al fresco: Al fresco dining isn’t just about ambience. It is also about atmosphere, aura and other words that mean the same thing as ambience. Al fresco dining is outdoor dining and, as such, it is a good alternative to indoor dining. There are really only the two kinds, although dining scientists remain hard at work on a third. Sitting out on a restaurant patio with friends is my second favorite summer activity, right behind thinking about going outdoors for a reason that is not al fresco dining and deciding not to.

Learn about barbecue: There are people who believe that hamburgers cooked on a hibachi can be called barbecue. Then too, there are other people who think the same about hibburgers cooked on a hambachi. Those people are really mixed up and can’t be helped. But if you want to learn about real ‘cue (a slang term that means barbecue everywhere but a pool hall), go to BBQ Ribfest. While you are there, ask for some burnt ends, a term that means brisket trimmings everywhere but a trauma center for buttocks injuries.